Eminem. ☆ The Real Slim Shady

May I have your
attention please
May I have your
attention please
Will the real Slim Shady
please stand up
I repeat
will the real Slim Shady
please stand up
We’re going to have a
problem here
Ya’ll act like
you never seen a white
person before
jaws all on the floor
like Pam like Tommy just
burst in the door
started whoopin her ass
worse than before
they first get divorced
throwing her over furniture
It’s the return of the
‘Oh wait no way
your kidding
he didn’t just say what I
think he did did he
And Dr Dre said
Nothing you idiots
Dr Dre’s dead
he’s locked in my basement
Feminist women love Eminem
Chicka chicka chicka
Slim Shady I’m sick of him
look at him
walking around
grabbing his you know what
limpin’ to you know who
yeah but hes so cute though
Yea I probably got a
couple of screws up
in my head loose but no worse
than what’s going on in your
parent’s bedrooms
Sometimes I wanna get on TV
and just let loose but can’t
but its cool for Tom
Green to hump a dead moose
my bum is on your lips
my bum is on your lips
and if I’m lucky you might
just give it a little kiss
and that’s the message that
we deliver to little kids
and expect them not to know
what a womens clitoris is
Of course they gonna
know what
intercourse is by the time
hit 4th grade they got the
discovery channel don’t they
We ain’t nothing but mammals
well some of us cannibals
who cut other people
open like cantaloupes
But if we can hump dead
animals and antelopes
then there’s no reason
that a man and another man
can’t elope
But if you feel like I
feel I got the antidote
Women wave your panty hoes
sing the and it goes
I’m Slim Shady
Yes I’m the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are
just imitating So
won’t the real Slim Shady
Please stand up
Please stand up
Please stand up
becuase I’m Slim Shady
Yes I’m the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are
just imitating So
won’t the real Slim shady
Please stand up
Please stand up
Please stand up
Will Smith don’t gotta cuss in
his raps to sell records
Well I do
so fuck him and fuck you too
You think I give a
damm about a Grammy
Half of you critics can’t even
stomach me let alone stand me
‘But Slim what if u win
wouldn’t it be weird
Why So you guys can
just lie to get me here
So you can sit me here
next to Britney Spears
Shit Christina Aguilera better
switch me chairs
So I can sit next to Carson
Daly and Fred Durst
And hear ’em argue over
who she gave head to first
Little bitch put me on
blast on MTV
‘yeah he’s cute but I think
he’s married to Kim hehe
I should download her
audio on mp3
And show the whole world
how you gave Eminem V D
I’m sick you little girl and
boy groups all
you do is annoy me So I’ve
been sent here to destroy you
And theres a million of us
just like me Who cuss like me
Who just don’t give a
fuck like me Who dress
like me
Walk talk and act like me
just might be the next best
thing But not quite me
I’m Slim Shady
Yes I’m the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are
just imitating So
won’t the real Slim Shady
Please stand up
Please stand up
Please stand up
becuase I’m Slim Shady
Yes I’m the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are
just imitating So
won’t the real Slim shady
Please stand up
Please stand up
Please stand up
I’m like a headtrip listen to
Cause I’m only giving you
things you joke about with
your friends inside your
living room only difference is
I got the balls to say it
in front of ya’ll And I don’t
gotta be false or sugar
coated at all
I just get on the
mic and spit it
And whether you like to
admit it rip
I just shit it better than
90persent of you rappers out there
Then you wonder how can
kidz eat up these albums
like valiums Its funny
cuz at the rate im
going when I’m 30
Ill be the only person in the
nursing home flirty
Pinching nurses asses
when I’m
jackin’ off with Jergens and
I’m jerking But this whole bag
of viagra isn’t working
And every single person is a
Slim Shady lurkin’ He could
be workin at Burger King
spitten on your onion rings
Or in the parking lot circling
screaming I don’t give a fuck
With his windows
down and system up
So will the real Shady
please stand up
and put one of those
fingures on each hand up
and be proud to be outta your
mind and outta control
and one more time
loud as you can
how does it go
I’m Slim Shady
Yes I’m the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are
just imitating So
won’t the real Slim Shady
Please stand up
Please stand up
Please stand up
becuase I’m Slim Shady
Yes I’m the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are
just imitating So
won’t the real Slim shady
Please stand up
Please stand up
Please stand up
becuase I’m Slim Shady
Yes I’m the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are
just imitating So
won’t the real Slim shady
Please stand up
Please stand up
Please stand up
becuase I’m Slim Shady
Yes I’m the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are
just imitating So
won’t the real Slim shady
Please stand up
Please stand up
Please stand up